Should you keep a “friend with benefit?”

A little bit of casual sex never hurt anyone…?

Adulting in your 30s
3 min readJan 7, 2024

I know there are many different relationships out there. So disclaimer: I’m writing this with the assumption that you want a committed monogamous long term relationship. That is personally my goal (open to being converted at some point though 😉).

If that’s not your cup of tea, jump to the last section.

Ok, you, person who wants to find a serious long term relationship.

A friend with benefit…yes, I’m talking about the person you keep around just for sex.

And I’ll just come right out and say that a friend with benefit is never a good use of your time.

Prove me wrong.

I know, the reality is much more complicated than its sounds. It’s never just sex. You also have good conversation. You laugh together. You are a lot in common. They know just the right way to touch you and you feel safe and secure in their arms.

I mean, are they even just a “friend with benefit”?

Do you (or they) see a future together?

If your goal is a committed relationship, then any time you spend with someone who you don’t see potential in as a long term partner, or someone who…



Adulting in your 30s

Musings and self reflections of a 30 something who feels like an adult but a kid at the same time