I’ve gone “no contact” for over a month since my breakup, and it feels great.
Close that door and don’t look back
I don’t see a future for us, they said.
I don’t feel inherently excited when thinking about the idea of us moving in together, they said.
Are they breaking up with me? As I heard these words, I knew what was coming. I started bracing myself.
I started telling close friends that we’re probably breaking up.
But I waited for them to say the actual words.
“Are we broken up now?” I’d ask.
“No, not yet…” they’d hesitate.
Nevertheless, I started prepping myself for the breakup.
Although I had a week head start, when they finally said “Yes” to my question of “Are we borken up now?” It still hurt. I felt the one week lead I had disappear into thin air as my heart was ripped out anew.
“How do you want to proceed? Should we still check-in once in a while?” they asked.
“No” I managed.
I don’t remember my exact words, but I was finally mature enough to know that every interaction would be reopening the wound, and I would only feel worse everytime I heard from him, or didn’t hear from him. I would be holding out hope, waiting for him to text at any moment to check-in, and I didn’t want to feel that way.