A letter to my younger self

On the path to uncovering my Samskaras

Adulting in your 30s

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I’m so sorry.

I’m sorry you feel like your purpose in life is to find love.

I’m sorry you’re so deeply afraid of being alone.

I’m sorry you spent so much time thinking about what other people thought. That you wasted sleep worrying about popularity.

I want you to know that you are enough.

Your family loves you. Even though they may not show it. They don’t know how. They were never shown how. It’s not their fault, and it’s not yours either.

You need to learn to love yourself.

Your happiness will not come from someone else. Not a guy. Not material things. Only you can give yourself happiness.

You are smart. And beautiful. And interesting.

Don’t hold back your thoughts for fear of other people’s judgement.

The people who judge you are not worth your time.

The people who put you down do it because they are hurting inside. It’s not about you. It’s about them.

Being beautiful and adored in it self is not what you should strive for. I know in movies and books it always seem to be about the beautiful girl and about falling in love and completing each other.

But you are complete. You don’t need someone else to complete you. You could find someone to share in your life’s adventures. Someone to support you, someone you want to support. But it’s far from the most important thing in life. Especially now. You are only 12.

And beauty is not what you see on TV and in magazines. I know it’s hard not to compare yourself to the glossy images, especially when you’ve been told since as long as you could remember to always be presentable to not risk losing your husband (wtf?).

But it’s not true. True friends and lovers will not like you less because you don’t fit the mold of “beauty.”

Believe in yourself, holding true to your beliefs, and standing up for what you believe in. The confidence to do all this is what will make you beautiful and attract people to you.

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Adulting in your 30s

Musings and self reflections of a 30 something who feels like an adult but a kid at the same time